Thursday, January 19, 2017

MJ Hammer

Given the title, I imagine that everyone is picturing something cool like this...

The reality is that it is more like this....

OK friends the story starts like this. I actually got the nickname MJ Hammer from volleyball. Those of you that know my height are very well aware I am not actually the amazing hitter the name would otherwise suggest. Friends yelled the name to encourage me to attack the volleyball as hard as I could despite the large possibility of the ball hitting the back wall or into the net. I must of been doing an ok job since I still have the name. It is sweet and enduring...and now the name has a whole new meaning. 

I would guess that most moms feel like they "manage" the family. After a recent friend gathering, only one person at the table could identify the father being the enforcer over the mother (not a large sample size). If asked, I would say I have the larger portion of the kid responsibility. P.S. I am not keeping track, but can you sue me for a feeling. However, I am willing to take bets that if scientifically put to the test it would come out a higher percent. 

If you don't believe me let me bring your attention to some proof:

See exhibit A.

So not entirely odd that my daughter (Jocelyn) wrote a letter to Dad, but odd that the other daughter (Aaliyah) told me she wrote her letter to me so I would not be left out. I actually feel like even though they were in different classes that they somehow coordinated the effort to not leave mom out. 

This theory was solidified when the second item made its way home from school. See exhibit B. 

Dad's item came home with a clear message of why the kids clearly prefer to jump into Brett's Honda Odessy over mom's when we leave church, but again my item from the other daughter (Aaliyah) came in with some uninterruptible writing and inability to tell me what it said. As far as I knew, it said Mom, Dad is cooler than you because he takes us to Arby's and let's us play Pokemon Go!

It is true, I am MJ Hammer. I am the enforcer! I don't have the answers of how to do this or what works. Kids are different and they have different needs. I feel like I "get" my kids and  can manage them because of that. I don't enjoy all the moments but feel really good when I get them all on the bus alive. And that achievement alone deserves a participant award regardless of the chaos prior to opening my van door to shuffle them into a bus door. 

May the force be with you friends! I'll take the force, gods, trolls, lucky charms, vibes, wishes, magic that anyone can spare. I am very fortunate but in this case I will take charity. Love, MJ